You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
He felt like a one man threesome
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
