Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
