dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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