this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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