Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
