we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
did i just pee glitter
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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