True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Randomize
