I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Randomize
