the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Randomize