Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
