Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
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