Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize