Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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