i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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