Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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