Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
