Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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