why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Randomize
