just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Do you have feelings for this penis?
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
