Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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