So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
