He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
