This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
