I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
