Umm I'm too high to move.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize
