WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize
