Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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