I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
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