I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Randomize
