i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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