I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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