Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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