How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Randomize
