you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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