Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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