You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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