Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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