You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Randomize