Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
