i need an iv and a liver transplant
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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