Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Randomize
