Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize