I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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