i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
