6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
