one two three fourrrrnication!
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I'm just crazy horny about you
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
