Three words: puerto rican gang bang
one might say we're banned from that church
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
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