Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize
