is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize
