I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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